All mah big-tittie gang, where ya at? Today is the day we honour the melons which have been journeying with us since the start of our adolescence. If you’re wondering what inspired me to write this article on a Wednesday morning – well, I’m a lil tired of people saying small titties are so much better and easier to handle. True, ain’t nobody denying that, BUT, BIG titties come with BIGGER advantages!
And, today, momma is going to list em all out. So, grab your titties (even if you’re at your office), and praise the Lord while you read this, because God clearly paid more attention to us!
Before that, just a little disclaimer – this is in no way dissing or judging anybody that is outside of this circle. Big tatas, small tatas and even no tatas – we shall love and appreciate all!
1. They Stand Out
One of the clearest advantages we have is that our boobies tend to stand out even when we don’t want them to. Which, to be honest, makes a girl look more fabulous in whatever she chooses to wear. Hey, some people call it slutty, but I call it feminine.
Certain outfits we big chested girls wear tend to hug our frame more beautifully and reveal the cleavage. I mean, it’s not elegant when you have ALL your boobage out, but that little peek-a-boobie moment is amazing. So, any boring outfit can be enhanced with just our tits.
2. Stress Balls
Not for men, but for us. Yes, we use our boobs as stress balls, because we can. And, momma is not ashamed to tell you the number of times I have publicly groped my own boobs – because they are simply comforting.
When you’re at home and no one is watching, don’t lie, bish – I know you hold those titties and walk around like nobody’s business. Or, when you’re just standing about, you can’t really stop your hand from reaching up there, huh? Just face it, they’re nice to hold, and grabbing them like a stress ball is very much comforting.
3. Great For Boob Sex
I have written a whole article on boob sex positions – do click to read. If you think about it, boob sex is only possible if you have big tatas that are flying around. To lick em, suck on em, fondle em and watch em bounce is pure bliss for your partner when you are gifted with big boobs.
So yeah, big titties are great for sex.
4. Apparently… We’re Intelligent?
So, the internet says that big tittie girls are more intelligent, according to a survey someone conducted. Now, Imma be honest – this may be pure bullsh*t, but hey, I guess big tits mean big brains as well!
Can’t relate though, cause momma over here is quite the dumba$$.
5. Dem Melons Be Making Heads Turn
Listen – only a big boobed girl can make heads turn. Whether she walks into a meeting room, or a train or simply down the street minding her own business – heads do turn our way, bishes!
And I can 100% attest to this, cause a bish has gone through this sh*t. Although I’m tired of random horny men looking, I guess my boobs deserve the attention.
6. Pillows For Our Fellow Men
Not only men, honey – but my pet dog, too, loves to lay his head on them. Big boobs are heavenly pillows for our fellow partners. They’re soft, luscious and they don’t give you a neck cramp when you wake up from your sleep.
The best part is, you get not one, but two pillows. It’s a set.
7. Emergency Pockets
The number of times my boobs have served as emergency pockets when I couldn’t put something in my purse is countless. Big boobs can hold anything and everything. From mini lotion bottles, to pencils and even love letters – you just need to learn how to hide things in them.
8. Milk Jugs
And the most obvious one, of course – big boobs are awesome milk jugs. Shout-out to all you beautiful preggo ladies blessed with big milk jugs.
They are lifesavers. My boobs have saved me from almost running into a wall, just cause they meet the wall first before my face is able to smash into it. Thank you, boobs. More testimony from a big-tittie girl that I found on the internet:
“My boobs saved my life once! Or at least, a lot of dental work. I was rollerblading in public with my then-boyfriend. For some reason, I didn’t think to stop before going over a hose. It caught, I flew up in the air, and landed chin-first – right onto my boobs! My boyfriend was so freaked out because it looked like I landed on my face. He instinctively picked me up like a rag doll and stood me upright (he was a former bodybuilder). I had nary a scratch, except for my palms. If not for my boobs, I would surely have lost some teeth and likely had some awful facial scars. Thank you, boobies!” – J.D.
10. They Offer Balance
For girls with bigger lower halves, big boobs often balance out the whole figure, so you don’t look too heavy on the lower half. If you have bigger thighs and a more curvy figure, big boobs are for sure going to give you a beautiful hourglass silhouette.
So there ya have it, girls. The perks of having big boobs. Whatever the situation may be, always remember to love and embrace yourself, cause there’s only one YOU in the world, bish, so you might as well be uniquely you. And, when you get the chance, flaunt your tatas because, they too, deserve to be loved and embraced.
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