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Home Opinion

My Biggest Turn-Offs In Bed #spillingtea

by Lipstiq Desk
September 22, 2025
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There’s one thing that many of us are secretly afraid of – having a bad reputation in bed. Every couple wants to feel comfortable in bed with their partner. However, unlike what we see in romantic films and read in novels, sex for women is not always enjoyable and euphoric.

At the end or during a sex sesh, not everyone moans, whimpers, or gleefully smiles. In reality, there are occasions when a woman feels unsatisfied after a sexual encounter, even if their partner may not be aware of it. I may not be a pro in bed, but I sure do know what some of the biggest turn offs for me are – I’ve got a list here for you:

Talking Too Much

Ross Friends GIF - Blah GIFs
Tenor

Communication is definitely key to good sex. But, jabbering nonsense could ruin every possible moment. When you and your partner are in an intimate space or mood, you’d want your actions to speak for themselves. Speaking of talking too much, one of the biggest turn offs is when the topic is about an ex or past life. No partner wants to discover the specifics of what and how their ‘soulmates’ interacted with an ex. It will only lead to a significant split and damage your relationship severely. To be safe, just stick to more action and less talking.

Not Being Passionate

Unhappy-Couple | The Publisher Online
The Publisher Online

Making out is all about love and being passionate. After all, who wants sex that lacks passion? If you’re just doing it for fun, your actions may show it, which seems irritating. So, if you’re not feeling it, know that it’s okay to let your partner know, and refrain from doing it.

A Horrible Kisser

Bad Kisser But Im A Cheerleader GIF - Bad Kisser But Im A Cheerleader Megan - Discover & Share GIFs
Tenor

The most potent act in a relationship – a kiss is what initiates physical intimacy. By kissing your lover, you’re expressing your joy at having a physical connection with them. By ‘kiss’ I don’t mean you suck on their face like some octopus. Make sure the kiss is gentle and passionate. Poor kissing skills will only annoy your partner and they might not be able to sense the passion you desire to convey. If you’re not such a great kisser, try to practice beforehand by kissing your own hand or looking into the mirror. To be a good kisser doesn’t mean you need to French all the way and use too much of tongue. Sometimes, something as cute as a peck on the neck might just fire up the romance.

Selfish Sex

Dear Coleen: I want more sex from him but he's so selfish in bed - Coleen Nolan - Daily Record
Daily Record

First off, sex is not just a one person thing. It takes two to tango. So, it’s obvious that both parties should be satisfied when it comes to making out. While engaging in physical contact with your partner, try not to only focus on your pleasure. Consider your partner’s interests and priorities as well. What works for you doesn’t necessarily work for your partner. Always choose a position that’ll satisfy you both equally.

Repetitive Sex

Stewie Repetition GIF - Stewie Repetition GIFs
Tenor

The world of sex is unfathomable. Even though you might believe you’ve covered every aspect of sex, there is still a ton of ground to be covered. However, some people stop trying new things once they get used to a certain sex position or activity. As a result, those who want a little bit more than usual are turned off. Don’t be afraid to try a new position every once in a while. You can also choose to change the location, because sex doesn’t always mean the ‘bedroom’. Try the couch, kitchen countertop or the shower. You’ll never know what surprise awaits you.

Recording

1 in 10 People Check Their Phone During Sex - Thrillist
Thrillist

This is a big NO! Seriously, are you filming a documentary or something? Sex is something to experience in the moment, and the last thing you’ll want to do is record or snap pictures during an intimate moment. If you’re in a committed relationship, this is straight up rubbish. Why record your partner when you have the liberty to savour every moment with them? Honestly, this is no different from what stalkers or pedophiles do. Creepy AF! If you still want to store memories, you could do it after all the love making is done and you’re under the sheets cuddling. Also, any kind of recording during a sex sesh might stir up trust issues and that’s not gonna end well. Best advice – keep the damn phone away.

Poor Hygiene

Bad Breath Family Guy GIF - Bad Breath Family Guy Peter Griffin GIFs
Tenor

Hygiene is essential when having sex. Just so you know, there’s a huge difference between dirty sex and unhygienic sex, and if you are unaware of it, your sexual experience may be hampered. Most women are instantly turned off by the sight of dirty hands, untrimmed nails, bad breath, or body odour. What makes it worst is if you don’t care for your genitals. So, just before you seduce your partner, be mindful to perform some self-love. Make certain you’ve showered, used deodorant, brushed your teeth, eliminated foul breath, and practiced basic hygiene. I’m sure I don’t need to explain why.

Rushing Sex

Hold your horses, boy!

Roadrunner Says Bye GIF - Roadrunner Bye Looney Tunes GIFs
Tenor

Sex is not just getting a wiener into the vijayjay. There’re other things just before that part and one of it is foreplay. Foreplay is the basis of a good sex session. Foreplay is the fundamental move that turns on and creates the mood, so hurrying through it or skipping it is a letdown. It eases pain from penetrative sex and aids in natural lubrication down there. Good foreplay can also help you show your partner that you love them without using words, proving that sex is about more than just satisfying physical needs. So, take your time and enjoy every minute of this intimate moment. If you really have no time for sex or you’re in a hurry to go some place, you can either save the sex sesh for later or switch to a quickie.

It’s Not All About The Wieners

None For GIF - None For Gretchen GIFs
Tenor

I dislike it when a guy thinks all we women want is the wieners between their thighs. Having sex is not always about penises – there’s more to it. Also, guys should stop emphasizing how to grow their dicks. Women don’t really care about the size, provided you know how to put your dick to good use. So never try to impress a girl with just your dick, because we do take note of other aspects too. Whether you’re smuggling an anaconda or just an inch worm, dicks are dicks, and it’s only good for you if you don’t know how to work with them.

More on sex? Read these:

Sex Positions For People With S-S-Sex Anxiety!

Veggies On Your Vag? Foods To Include In Your Sex Sesh!

active sex lifehackslipsticlelove and relationshipsOpinionpleasurequickieSexsex 101Sex articlesSex guidesex talkssex tips for dummiesturn offs
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