Our friends are like our family. The family of outsiders that we love spending time with and sharing our secrets with. But sometimes, you just don’t realize that the friends you have, may actually just be your worst enemy. Some might use you to their own advantage or put you down when you’re not having a really good day. These toxic friends can do a lot more damage to us, so identify which of these “frenemies” you have, and may be do a little spring cleaning in the friend department.
1. The Debbie Downer
You’ve got a new job. Or you’re boyfriend’s proposed, or you finally bought yourself a fancy apartment. The first thing you do is call your friends to celebrate, right? But there’s one girl, whose life isn’t going that great, that seems to be throwing negative vibes all over and can’t seem to be happy for you just for two minutes. But at the same time you feel bad for her. If she’s a sincere friend who does help you, consider lending her a hand to get her a good position, but if she is a constant pain and is too stubbon, it’s time to let her go.
2. The Backstabber
You’ll tell her all your secrets when she insists on all the details. And when you tell her it’s between the both of you, you suddenly end up hearing about it from your other relatives. Or perhaps she’s even taken a fancy in the guy your crushing on and has already made several advances that seem to be working. That must hurt, doesn’t it? A friend like this needs to be ditched, so move on, stop thinking about that person and focus on the friends you do have that you’ve not been spending enough time with.
3. The Deal Breaker
So you’ve been planning to head out to this new bar that everyone’s talking about with your pal for weeks now. And tonight’s the night to put on that new dress you just bought to feel like a million bucks! You text your friend in the afternoon “OMG I’M SO EXCITED”, and she replies with a smiley face. Before you know it, she hasn’t said anything about it and when the hour is coming close, she says she’s not going. But wait! It’s not the first time she’s blown you off to do her own thing! Deal breakers can be incredibly inconsiderate, especially when you’re making time for them. So, if you have someone who blows you off more than 3 times in a month period, it might be time to end it, or at least sit down and talk about what this friendship means.
4. The Criticizer
There’s no pleasing someone, sometimes. Most people have family members who still give you a hard time with your career choices or the person you’re dating, but we carry on. But how do you deal with a friend whose equally a criticizer as your aunt who tells you about your bad choice in your career path? Aren’t friends supposed to be supportive? Some friends are blunt and honest about things but it is best to differentiate someone who is honest friend or extreme criticizer. A criticizer would leave you in situations where you have to defend yourself and that might send any feel-good moments running out the door.
5. The Stiff Competitor
A little competition can be healthy, but what if your friend is trying to compete with you in everything you have – a good job, the gorgeous boyfriend, and a killer shoe collection that any girl would die for. Stiff competitors have common similarities as The Backstabber, but they’re simply trying to be just like you, but with some added advantages. If you notice someone like this in your social circle, try to appeal to their self-esteem. They may have some issues about themselves that needs working on, so simply humble yourself with them and make it apparent that friendship is not about who ends up victorious in any situations.