Here comes the bride, all dressed in WTF?!!
When it’s wedding season, brides scour every corner of the globe for the ideal gown. They are told that this will be the most significant day of their lives, so it makes sense that they would want to choose the greatest outfit for it. However, just because the majority of us envision fairytale nuptials, it doesn’t mean that our imaginations don’t cross over into the bizarre and crazy.
From vajayjays to gloves, we’ve got some of the strangest wedding attire that should have never, ever seen the light of day. And for future brides – DO NOT take inspiration from these garments!
1. The Cocoon
Nothing compares to donning a wedding gown that looks like a tampon. From the bows to the frills to the strange silhouette and the face hole – everything about this is awful. Was there anyone at the wedding who could maintain composure?
2. Three Balls, One Guy
This dress can definitely serve as a snowman figure. This one raises a lot of questions for me. To begin with, where are her arms? And, what’s with that shape, anyway? I guess the dress didn’t matter much, seeing as the two of them appear to be content, and I suppose that’s what matters most in the end.
3. You May Slice The Bride
First off, ewww! This probably means she was unable to move until the visitors had finished eating down to her legs. Plus, it seems sticky and somewhat unhygienic, but I suppose they liked it anyways.
4. Diaper Dandy
Well, at least they’re all clean! Attention experimenters everywhere: just because something is white, it doesn’t mean it’s wedding dress material. Take this diaper outfit for example. Why on earth would anyone think this is a good idea?
5. Body Paint Bride
Just to be clear, they’re all almost naked. Body paint, which is exactly what you’re seeing, is probably the worst fad when it comes to wedding dresses. This fancy wedding attire is nothing more than paint on exposed skin. For the brides, it seems a little okay – but just imagine those guys without their underwear!
6. Recycled Gown
Is…is that…newspaper? I get it. Wedding dresses are pricey. Before resorting to constructing one out of paper, though, it seems like there are a few other options you may explore, such as borrowing one, shopping at a thrift store, or renting one. But dressing yourself in a pile of paper just makes you look like a pile of waste.
7. Butterfly Netting
Butterfly netting was probably the theme. I’d wager a large sum of money that the wedding guests were incredibly uncomfortable. Imagine attempting to hug the newlyweds while avoiding looking at her transparent dress and white bikini. She might as well wear just a white bikini!
8. Sheepish Love
She obviously loves sheep and she’s proving it twice. If there’s anything more weird than a themed wedding, it’s one with a sheep theme. The bride is not only escorting a woolly companion on a leash, she is also donning a woolly outfit too. She seems to really love sheep, but the love might have gotten a little too far.
9. No such thing as too much
Looks like her dream princess wedding came true. But you know what’s the best part here? Outside the voluminous dress, the extravagant crown, and the fairy wand, the fact that her new husband appears to be suffocated escapes the bride’s notice.
10. Wedding at the swamp
I suppose if it makes you happy, you just gotta have it. Regarding this strange couple, I’ll just say that they appear to be really content. They do indeed appear to be dressed as cartoon ogres, but it seems like it’s their thing. Oh look, they even have Donkey there.
11. Where’s the partner?
I have tons of questions. Did the guests realize the wedding would only be a one-person show? What would he or she do for the part ‘you may now kiss the bride’? I’m not sure what to say, exactly.
12. Kiss That Lip
NO WAY! Why? Will the groom have a big cock on his tux? Everything about this dress is definitely wrong.
Women love to show off their assets, but it shouldn’t be to this extent. I don’t know why she was ever permitted to wear this in the first place. Babe, you gotta put your girls away!
14. Shotgun Wedding
She mastered the art of “there’s no such thing as ‘too’ revealing”. Finding the ideal wedding gown while expecting might be challenging. This bride opted for the one that is the most overt, which has a belly window. Naturally, pregnant ladies want to show off their bumps, but this is excessive and also disgusting. Just imagine the guests’ faces when they hugged her – how uncomfortable! For me, she looks like she got shot right in the belly.
What are we doing, practicing good hygiene? And it wasn’t even pandemic time yet! To be honest, it looks more like a bunch of condoms than gloves. Take another look if you must.
16. The Octo-Bride
I’m sorry, but what was the logic here? That’s right; there’s NONE! Why would you need an octo-gown for your wedding? Good thing it stopped at just four tentacles. Come on – it’s your wedding, not a fancy dress contest!
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