Do you always find it difficult to turn down requests? Do you always make an effort to be nice in hopes that everyone will like you? Well, these might be signs that you are a people-pleaser.
Understandably, niceness and kindness are considered wonderful traits to have. However, they can be self-destructing when you prioritize others’ needs before your own. They can cause harmful effects within yourself if you continue to please other people – to your detriment.
Before it’s too late, take note of the five signs that you might be a people-pleaser:
1. You find it hard to say NO
Not wanting to seem arrogant or selfish, you would opt to say yes all the time. Another reason might be that you don’t want to jeopardize the relationship you have with your friend, so you would sacrifice your precious time in aiding others.
2. You constantly agree with people
It’s wonderful when you and a buddy share the same interests or viewpoints since this strengthens your friendship. Pretending to agree only to be liked, on the other hand, might lead to you engaging in behavior that is contrary to your principles.
3. You excessively apologize for things you didn’t do
Self-blaming for things you have no control over, or you didn’t do, can bring harmful effects on your self-esteem. There is no need to feel guilty for being your authentic self or taking the blame for others’ mistakes.
4. You think you are responsible for managing people’s feelings
Hanging around people and getting to know their vibes is a great way to bond and it’s super beneficial when you are able to recognize how your actions and words affect others. However, that does not necessarily mean that you are responsible to make them happy. Believing that you are can be problematic in itself.
5. You find ways to get complimented
Praises and compliments can make anyone’s day, but, people pleasers rely on constantly being praised in making sure that they are being validated. You shouldn’t base your self-worth on words from others often, because then, that is the only confirmation that you would seek constantly.