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Getting It Together: Why A Devastating Breakup Will Always Make You

by Emma Mallaburn
November 19, 2015
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Photo: wallpaperstock.net
Photo: wallpaperstock.net

Love and being in love is one of the most wonderful thing anyone can experience in their short time on Earth but it can also be a real motherf****r. You know it, I know it, hell we all bloody know it. Love hurts the most when you think that someone is “the one” and they may be just that but they have decided that you’re… not.

I think millennials have a hard time believing that there is only one person out there that’s meant for you and you’re meant for because it’s ridiculous. I beg to differ. I truly feel that “the one” exists and in this life you either end up with them or you end up learning something from them.

If you’re currently going through the latter, just persevere and know that this awful time will only be a valuable lesson. Here are some of the reasons why enduring a gut-wrenching breakup will make you instead of break you:

You get to know yourself – I think this is the most difficult and best part about going through a breakup. Often when being in a relationship, it’s easy to lose yourself in love. You stop doing the things you enjoy and instead do things that he enjoys. You get comfortable and not in a way where you’re letting him get to know your flaws but in a way that you no longer care. It’s really important to find yourself after a breakup and more often than not, you end up learning a few things about yourself.

Photo: pixabay.com
Photo: pixabay.com

You can enjoy being by yourself – One downside to being in a long-term relationship is the fact that one get can get really used to having someone there and when he isn’t, it becomes strange and almost painful. Going through a painful breakup allows for you to learn to be on your own and enjoy time with yourself, which is of course really important if you want to have any kind of relationship in the future. You get to realise that while it is always nice to be with someone you love, it’s more important to love being with yourself.

You learn to forgive – While you want to hate him until the end of eternity for shattering your heart into a million pieces, you realise that forgiving is more helpful to the entire healing process and your soul. Harbouring hatred will not bring the relationship back or heal you any faster, if anything it will just make you bitter.

You can’t control everything – A heavy breakup will teach you that no matter how hard you try and how hard you work at things – somethings things are just not meant to be. You have to learn to accept that some things are completely out of your reach and is totally up to fate to decide for you. Maybe the relationship was not meant to be but meant to teach you or prepare you for your other relationships.

You understand what love really is – The most valuable lesson of a life-changing breakup is to understand that the most important kind of love is the one you have for yourself. Before you can make someone else happy, you need to learn to make yourself happy and be happy with yourself.

Tags: Breakuplove and relationshipsRelationship ArticlesRelationships and Dating
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