You meet the person of your dreams, you fall in love, you get comfortable, and you want to spend every waking moment with the object of your adoration. But you’re nowhere near married let alone getting engaged. The question is, should you move in with your partner? How soon is too soon?
And if you choose to move in together, will you then constantly wonder if the speed rate of your relationship could cause not a “happily ever after” but instead, contribute to the key factor for a divorce? Paranoia?
Just so you know, the top five reasons why couple gets divorced are:
1. Adultery
2. Abuse
3. Lack of communication
4. Economic issues
5. Boredom
When you move in together that early (in the spur of a “I’m so in love” moment), you’re opening up opportunities to end up being too complacent in a comfort zone and therefore, moving forward ahead of your relationship’s time. Which will leave you nothing else to explore by the time planning a “happily ever after” comes into play. And what if you get too comfortable, to the point where you think there’s not much need to really communicate anymore? This means, some boredom might ensue.
“But everybody does it! We see in on TV and magazines all the time. So many celebrities do it!”
Don’t obsess over what Hollywood does or how they do it. Celebrity couples can seamlessly move in with one partner (and then another when the previous doesn’t work out) because they are financially able to. More importantly, because of the nature of their careers and lifestyles (read: busy), spending time back home is actually a luxury.
And don’t even get us started on what numerous TV series usually portray. No adult in the right mind can afford to move in together and live in New York but spend all day sitting in a coffee place or in a bar.
Clearly, you don’t fall into that category.
“Okay, I know my relationship hasn’t been going on for very long but my partner definitely seems like marriage material!”
The fact is, you don’t know that. We don’t know that. Have you known the other party long enough or well enough to know that this is the person you’re going to be walking down the aisle with? Sure, we all talk about getting married and having five kids and spending the rest of our life together with the other half – but only when times are good and when we’re in a “loved up” state of mind. Sorry to say, that excuse alone is not applicable to possibly surviving being long-term unmarried live-in partners.
Living together doesn’t necessarily guarantee a stronger relationship. Unless if you’re engaged and well on your way to marriage, moving in together too soon can jeopardize what you currently have! And it’s not about being conservative. It’s about being wise and cautious about co-habitation.
Keep in mind that statistically, couples who live together prior to marriage have a higher divorce rate than couples who do not.
Don’t fall into that statistic.
