Losing your virginity can seem pretty terrifying.
Everyone’s first time is going to be different, but there are still some things everyone should know before they lose their virginity. If you are going into the experience with no idea what to expect, here are some tips that will help you get through it without being so nervous because you will have a better idea of what is going to happen.
Here are 10 things you need to know before losing your virginity and remember, the most important one: HAVE FUN!
1. It will hurt, but it won’t be that painful
If you are wondering if sex is going to hurt, then honestly, yeah it is. It is going to hurt a little but not an awful, horrible pain that you cannot live with. To make it less painful, make sure you are amply aroused before sex. Not only do you want to be genuinely turned on, you want to be sufficiently lubricated. Your partner will have trouble entering you if you are too dry, hence the discomfort and pain. Keep a water-based lube on hand just in case.
2. Don’t have too-high expectations
Sex generally improves as you get to know someone and become more comfortable with each other’s bodies. Do not feel pressured into making it the best night ever, because this is just the first of many.
3. Use protection
Always, always remember to use protection. There is no such thing as totally safe sex but you sure can be safer. Make sure he is wearing a condom. Just because you are a virgin, does not mean he is too so make sure he is wearing a condom — wouldn’t want to catch a sexually transmitted disease or get pregnant after your first time now would you?
4. You might bleed
The reason a lot of girls bleed during their first is because it is also the first time their hymen breaks. However, it is possible to break your hymen before ever having sex, through sports or another kind of injury. Some girls don’t bleed and some do. If you do, don’t be embarrassed because it is completely normal.
5. Enjoy foreplay
Foreplay is very important. All the stuff that leads up to intercourse — kissing, touching, oral sex — is part of the sexual experience; it really is not just about penetration. So, don’t forget to enjoy the foreplay.
6. Don’t over plan it
If you are going to plan sex a few days or weeks in advance and decide where it will be, how it will happen, what you will do, DON’T. Planning it in advance only adds pressure and makes you more nervous because you won’t be able to stop thinking about it. Plus, plans always go wrong in some way, so you are bound to get disappointed. Best to just let things happen when they happen.
7. Speak up
Don’t be afraid to speak up. Let him know what feels good and what doesn’t. Your first time might be awkward, so you should do what you can to make yourself feel comfortable. If that means having the lights off, keeping your shirt on or staying in only one position, let him know. Tell him your likes and dislikes and don’t let him do things that you are uncomfortable with.
8. It won’t necessarily be a memorable experience
Losing your virginity might be as magical as you expect it to be. Sure, for some people it is – but for others, it’s not that special. A lot of people build up their first time to be this incredible, amazing experience, but that might just disappoint you.
9. Don’t assume he’s the expert
Don’t assume that your guy is a sexpert. He may be getting a lot of his information about sex from porn and the tales his buddies share with him. And, even if he is experienced, every sexual encounter is unique. He is just as worried about pleasing you as you are getting him off.
10. You should only do it when you’re ready
Have sex when you are ready. Do not force yourself to do it, do not get pressured into it. Do it when you feel like it’s time.
