Civil servant Jamilah Baharuddin (names have been changed) and her husband divorced in 2012 after 12 long years of conflict with his family who did not approve of their marriage.
The 35-year-old woman, who earns about RM6,500 monthly, says they most probably wouldn’t have split up if she wasn’t working because she would have to be dependent on her husband to support her and their three children financially.
“That’s one of the reasons why a lot of Malay women in rural areas are scared to step forward and get a divorce when they are abused ― they can’t survive without their husband’s assistance,” Jamilah told The Malay Mail Online recently.
The number of divorces in Malaysia has more than doubled in merely eight year since 2004. A whopping 56,760 divorces were recorded in 2012, which sums up to a marriage breaking down every 10 minutes.
According to statistics provided by the Syariah Judiciary Department Malaysia (JKSM), the number of Muslim couples getting divorced increased by 2.3 times from 20,916 in 2004 to 47,740 in 2012, and to 49,311 last year.
On the other hand, the number of non-Muslim marriages broke down at a slightly higher rate from 3,291 divorces in 2004, increasing by 2.7 times to 9,020 cases in 2012.
Although many couples are increasingly splitting up, the number of marriages never fail to increase.
A total of 112,262 Muslim couples tied the knot in 2004 and this number has risen steadily over the years to 148,806 marriages in 2012, according to the Department of Islamic Development Malaysia (JAKIM).
However, the pattern for non-Muslim marriages is more erratic.
A total of 57,530 non-Muslim couples got married in 2004, a number that declined the following year, after which the figure rose and fell until 65,993 marriages were registered in 2012.
The Malay Mail Online interviewed four Syarie and family lawyers recently and most of them agreed that the rising divorce rate is due to women becoming more financially independent.
“With the rat race, better education, economic independence, influence of multimedia and the women having access to legal advice, and better understanding of the laws, they know their rights and they are not as tolerant as the last generation was,” said Syarie lawyer Rafie Mohd Shafie.
Based on his observation, marriages generally last between five and 10 years before breaking down.
Family lawyer Honey Tan similarly said women are now more aware of their rights, but noted that the law still discriminates against women as they generally end up with a lesser share, especially homemakers, when matrimonial assets are divided during a civil divorce.
“In the past when women were uneducated or poorly educated, getting married was just about the only option open to them to survive,” said Tan.
Tan added that although the Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976 considers the non-monetary contributions of women who quit their jobs to look after their children, their husbands will always receive a greater share of matrimonial assets.
“The ability of men to earn income is still valued more than the ability of women to look after the home and the family, especially the children,” said the lawyer.
Datuk Dr Shamsul Amri Baharuddin, an anthropologist from Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia (UKM), said the stress of modern life in the city is one of the contributing factors behind the rising divorce rate.
“Financial instability will cause a lot of problems,” he said.
Another university lecturer trained in anthropology, Dr Julian Hopkins, observed that a rising divorce rate is usually linked to industrialisation, pointing to women’s increased financial independence and greater social acceptance of divorce.
“Over the second half of the 20th century, there is a correlation between more women being in the labour force and more divorces,” Hopkins told The Malay Mail Online.
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