You’ve recently learned something important about yourself – your sexual orientation/identity, and you might want to come out to your family, friends, or other people. If you do, you’re probably wondering how – like who to tell and how to do it. Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered!
You don’t have to come out if you’re LGBTQ+
It’s 2021 and a lot of things are progressing, but violence and discrimination against LGBT people are still very much prevailing. Concerned about your safety or maybe cause you think sharing your identity is not necessary – that’s valid too. You don’t have to tell anyone if you don’t want to. Your queerness is unquestionably not dependent on whether people know or not.
Who to come out to?
Answer: It could be anyone. But, who you decide to come out to should be based on one basic principle, which is trust. As long as you know that they’re gonna understand that you’re still you and support you for simply being you. Basically, you should come out to someone who you know will make you feel safe.
How to come out?
So, you know who you want to come out to and the next step is how you’re gonna do it. Understand that it’s alright to do it through texts or video calls. It doesn’t have to be a face-to-face conversation unless you want it to be. Regardless of the method though, consider the time and location which will be convenient and comfortable for you (and them too).
For example:
- It might not be a good idea to have it in a public place where strangers could overhear you, especially if you want privacy.
- If you send a text or email, it’s best to avoid doing it while they’re on vacation or at work.
In short, you should come out in any way that makes you feel most comfortable, healthy, and safe.
The final word
You don’t actually even need to label yourself in LGBTQ terms if you think it’ll limit your experience of yourself. Yes, your label will be used by others as a mental shortcut to define you, but it shouldn’t limit your experience based on how you think someone of a particular label should behave, act, and think.
Coming out can also be a very scary and difficult process for some, especially when you have no idea how the person you’re telling would react. You may feel ashamed, isolated, and afraid. In spite of all that, Lipstiq’s DMs are always open and we’re always willing to chat if you need someone to talk to 🙂