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Dealing with your little “Hulk”

by Weiwen
September 29, 2011
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Every parent dotes on their kids to bits and all they want in return is for their child to love them back and nothing else. However children aren’t very good at expressing themselves when they’re upset or angry and in the midst of throwing tantrums they might end up hitting you. It may not hurt much on the outside, but it’ll definitely hurt you deep inside as you wonder what you’ve done to deserve this. The thing is, until children learn to communicate verbally they only have physical means to convey how they feel.

The question is, how much should you tolerate and what can you do to prevent this from repeating? The next time your child attempts to hit you again, hold his hands and hug him, not in a forceful way but firmly and tell him that you love him but nobody likes to be hit. Children learn from example so if you don’t want them to resort to physical reactions you shouldn’t encourage it either. Spanking your child is a taboo topic while some say it is wrong, others think it is necessary as a form of discipline. The act of spanking your child when he or she has done something wrong may lead them to think that hitting is perfectly normal.

Communication is extremely important to create a healthy and loving bond between you and your child. Explain to them what anger is and help them deal with it. Tell them that it’s okay to be angry but it doesn’t give them the right to hit anyone because someone could get hurt. Teach them to walk away from the situation by giving them a time out and when they’re feeling less angry, he or she can come back and talk about what they were unhappy about.

Children are very simple creatures. Most of the time, they get angry when they are refused attention or something they want and you might be guilt tripped into giving in to their unreasonable wants just because you don’t want them to hate you. It’s important that you know where you stand and that is as their parent. Teach them that rewards and privileges such as dessert or television time needs to be earned with little chores such as cleaning their room, putting away the toys or finishing up their homework. A child who gets everything by throwing tantrums will continue to use this method to get what they want.

Always attempt to resolve the hitting issue as early as possible as you don’t want your child to exhibit negative behaviour when in school or in public during later stages of life. Help them deal with their anger by talking it out with them or engaging in activities such as sports or art to express themselves.

A child’s diet also has a lot to do with their behaviour. Overconsumption of junk food with high amounts of sodium and sugar can cause mood swings and hypertension so it’s important to ensure that you limit junk food intake and increase vegetables and fruits in your child’s diet. If your child continues to exhibit violent tendencies don’t be afraid to bring them to a counsellor for professional help as they’ve had years of experience and can help your child deal with anger.

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