Being parents while juggling a full time career can be hectic. If you’ve watched shows like MTV’s Sweet 16 or Nanny 911, chances are you never want to have kids in this lifetime but nature will takes its course, you’ll probably fall in love, get married and have babies before you can say diapers. There are good children and then there are those spoiled bratty ones. Here’s how the latter comes about and what you can do to avoid them:
1. The Bane of Technology
Technology gives us a lot of things that we take for granted. We all understand how tough and draining work can be but growing kids are curious and inquisitive hence needing plenty of attention from their parents.
I know a kid who was given an iPad at a very young age and he never made contact with any of us visiting adults. No hellos unless he was forced to do so and not once did his finger leave the touch screen. He would demand for the tablet everytime he was awake and would only put it down when sleepy. One wonders if the child will ever learn to fly a kite, build sandcastles or draw. Electronic gadgets, games and television can distract your kids when you’re too tired or busy to teach them but these should only be rewards to good behaviour and must be limited to half an hour a day.
2. Domestic Help
Maids and nannies are merely extra help and shouldn’t be expected to replace your role as a mother or father. How many of you have driven past a school during your lunch hour break and notice the maids carrying the school bags. Teach your kids that their amahs or kakaks aren’t meant to be at their beck and call. Draw boundaries on what is allowed. For example, they aren’t supposed to ask for help with their homework or doing small things they can do themselves like switching on the lights, feeding themselves and tying their shoelaces.
Now you may think, “I’m already paying the for the help, of course I should let my domestic help do everything to make my money’s worth!” To put into perspective, maids are people too like you and me. Kids who don’t learn to fend for themselves will grow up not knowing how to be independent resulting in a difficult time at school or work. Parents should also teach their kids to respect domestic help as part of the family.
3. Attitude Adjustments
Children learn very quickly and they know for a fact that tears brings them cookies, candies and ceases scolding. For many parents, crying may seem like poor parenting in the eyes of others so they end up giving in to their children. This may seem cruel but children need to feel frustration and unhappiness otherwise they will get accustomed to attention and affection resulting in spoiled children who will cry when things don’t go their way. This can be very difficult to deal with in the long run. If a child does not learn to deal with difficulties, he or she will have problems as an adult.
Nannies, babysitters or maids will not discipline your children the way you want them to. We all want the best for our kids but remember that what’s easy for you may not be good for them at the end of the day. Children are empty canvases who don’t know right from wrong. All they know if what they do gives them a response they want, they will keep doing it regardless if it’s good or bad.
