As difficult as leaving a relationship can be it is important not to let the people who’ve hurt you have power over you forever. There comes a day where you will have to put your failed relationship behind you and move onto better things.
The first step to recovery is being honest with yourself. You have to determine how you really feel because only then will you be able to confront your feelings properly. Are you really trying to get over this guy or do you actually want to get back together with him? You can only accept that the relationship is done for good when you are honest with yourself and you will only get over it after accepting this.
Start replenishing your relationship with yourself as an individual, over the course of your past relationship you may have forgotten how to be content alone. This is a vital step towards recovery, you need to focus on yourself. Getting over breakups aren’t about our ex, they’re about you.
During this period though you will probably feel like moping around, you have to push yourself because it doesn’t matter if anyone else does if you’re not doing it yourself. While it is only natural to be in a dark place after parting with a loved one, you do not need to keep yourself there. You can’t let the feeling of sadness rule the rest of your life and get the best of you because then you really will never fully recover and no one deserves that. You have to remember that these feelings wont last forever though sometimes it seems that they will!
Find ways to enjoy things in life that you didn’t have the chance to with your partner so much. This could mean, for example, indulging in your favourite foods, going clothes shopping or having girls nights out. This will help you see that there are other things out there to make you happy and should hopefully push you to explore new things more.
The final step to recovery in my opinion is forgiveness. Holding grudges or harbouring hard feelings towards your previous partner means still not being properly over them as you are still letting them emotionally effect you. In becoming a better person, you must learn to let go of everything and see it merely as the past. Forgive whatever wrong doings you may have suffered as even though they may not have acknowledged their wrongs, you know your rights from wrongs and that puts you at a higher level of understanding than them.
You should now be ready to put yourself back out there and start meeting new people! However, if you find yourself having difficulty trusting or loving or if you are subconsciously comparing a new man to the previous one, it just means you need to wait a bit longer before settling down again. You have to love your next partner like you have never been hurt because other wise it is unfair on them and you will eventually find yourself in yet another failed relationship.
Hopefully the prospect of potentially leaving someone or being alone is not so scary now!
