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Home Parenting

What To Do When Your Child Has Imaginary Friends

by Genevieve Nunis
December 12, 2012
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We were all kids once, and at that age, we depended on our imagination to take us places. Pretend play, as it’s called is great for a child’s imagination, growth, and even the development of social skills. Using their fantasy enables them to practice their verbal skills and sometimes, their confidence.According to observations, kids with imaginary friends have found to be more articulate and confident than others, but there are a few differences found in social or emotional understanding and in personality that causes children to create a new friend in their mind.

About 60% of young children develop imagery friends between the ages 3 and 5, and this is a time when they’re beginning to develop their own identities, and telling the difference between fantasy and reality. Children generally outgrow their imaginary friends as soon as they start school, but in some instances, they continue playing with their imagery friends over the age of 7. (Source)

Why Do Kids Have Imaginary Friends?

According to Marjorie Taylor, professor of psychology and author of Imaginary Companions and the Children Who Create Them says, “the appearance of an imaginary companion in the lives of these children is not necessarily a sign of loneliness or psychological distress”. (Source)
Parents seem to think that the illusion of an imaginary friend in their children’s life might be a warning sign to a child’s development, but it could simply be a tactic of theirs to feel a little less lonely in the world.
Rejection among peers and anxieties related to major changes in their lives, like a new baby in the picture, divorce, or lack of attention could even be the cause of it.

But imaginary friends don’t always have to be a bad problem. Some kids create imaginary fiends to help them cope with something new in life, or even to acquire a new skill. What is is, we will never know, but as long as they’re safe, then there really isn’t anything to worry about.
Pretend play helps kids grow their imagination and most of all, simply have fun. (Source)

How Far is Too Far?

Children will begin to let go of their imaginary friends at their own pace, so it’s best not to interfere, unless the signs seem to alarm you. If they’re 10 years old and still seem to have imaginary friends, then it’s possible that your child is still going through various stages of social anxiety. The first thing to do, is to NOT seek the help of a child therapist. Instead, talk to your child and look out for any patterns in his or her attitude in school and at home. Should it be something you feel that you’re unable to understand, talk to professional and seek his advice first before sending your child over. Children are smarter than you think – they know when they’re being sent to a therapist.

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