Looks like your baby is going to college! Gosh, it must feel like it was only yesterday when your child grew his first tooth! As your grown-up is all ready to spread their wings and fly, you may be having a really hard time saying goodbye. Empty nest syndrome, as it’s called is something easy to cope with, but you’ll be happy to know that all parents go through it.
1. Be Prepared
As much as you’ve anticipated your little one leaving, it’s not the same as actually preparing for the big day. You have 17 to 18 years to do it, after all.
You’re not the only one to feel the anxiety letting go, but your child would also go through the same time. As excited as they would be to spread their wings, it’s still a new beginning for them too. So hold back any negative emotions or difficulty in making your child feel guilt or pressure for leaving. Instead of saying “What am I going to do without you”, say “I am so proud of you. You will do great out there”.
2. Don’t Force Communication
As a parent, your main fear in life is that you’d lose your child forever once they head off to college, so to cope with that you call every few hours of the day just to see how they’re doing. It doesn’t work so well with a lot of kids, but give them time to settle in and when they need you, they will call you. Doing the opposite will most likely end up in arguments or them telling you to give them some space.
Fix a time where you both agree on so you can catch up with each other instead of calling at the ‘wrong time’.
3. Shift Your Focus
In case you didn’t know, you should be feeling like a proud mother now that you’ve successfully raised a child whose now in college. Congratulations!
And now that you’ve got time on your hands, focus on working on your marriage by spending more time with your husband, or concentrate on your younger kids. You’re not the only one who misses someone in the family – your younger ones might be missing their older brother or sister too.
Use the free time to adapt to the new situation and use it as an opportunity to grow and bond with your family members.
4. Accept Support
Some parents take the leaving of their child negatively with overwhelming grief, sadness, and sometimes depression. It’s only natural as you’ve spent a large number of your years raising your child, that once your child spreads their wings, you’re left with a major void in your life.
In the event that your grief becomes overwhelming, do not hesitate to speak to a therapist, of even a family member or a friend. It’s important to acknowledge your grief instead of bottling it all in, and relish the chance to talk it through with your spouse, because you’re probably not the only one going through it.
5. Start Looking After Yourself
Now that you’ve set your child on the right path, you will have a little more time to do the things you want for yourself. Pamper yourself with a spa treatment or go out or rekindle the flame with your man, you never really lost anyone in your life, so there’s no reason to stay home and mope about it!
These tips will help you rekindle the romance in your marriage.
