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Signs You Shouldn’t Proceed With A Second Date

Look out for these red flags

by Aqilah
May 29, 2025
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Alright, a couple of months ago, I came up with an article titled Dating Etiquette: Things You Should Never Say On A First Date, basically it is a straightforward handy guide on things not to say, not to do when you’re on your first date. I explained things such as why you shouldn’t bother bringing up topics like your exes, what your dream wedding might look like and of course, sensitive subjects such self-esteem—so on, and so forth. In short, the article is mainly a guide on how you, yourself wouldn’t look messed up on the first date. And so now, I figured, why don’t we change the POV for a little bit? 

We’re going to flip the table and look out for the signs that your date could be a messed up person, and why you, as a perfect unicorn human-being, shouldn’t consider going for a second date. Here’s a simple truth; most people will tell you exactly who they are if you’re listening carefully. And the minute they started to show you a sign of a red flag, believe them. Please do not dwell on the possibility of, ‘Oh, maybe they didn’t mean it. I’m sure they’re actually a nice person.’’ Oh please, honey. Get over it. Which, if you decide to look at the silver lining, just means you saved your energy and set yourself one step closer to finding the right match.

(Source: Instagram)

1. He ghosted you right after the first date

Here’s a scenario: You thought the first date went well, you enjoyed your moment together, you guys shared a lot of stuff, they promised to take you out on a second date next weekend, you said okay, you guys went home and suddenly, no text, no call, they watched your Insta stories but didn’t bother to check on a simple ‘’How’s thing?’’ text. You moved on, found another potential match and out of a sudden they came back, claiming those second dates after almost a month of not hearing any news. My verdict? Just move on, sis. There’s no use. They’re just bored and fling from one partner to another. Find someone who is serious enough in getting to know you. 

2. He went straight into the ‘’bedroom talk’’ 

Having a ‘’sex talk’’ is totally a turn off when it comes to second date. Unless, you’re down for it? But if you’re looking for a more establishment-complex relationship, a sex is not a good sign for date number two. Again, though, sometimes the passion is just out of this world and you can’t keep your hands off each other and IT JUST HAPPENS. Follow your guts. 

3. His idea of a second date is coming over past 10 p.m. 

Again, that booty is just what he wanted. Either he is just looking for a no-string attached type of relationship or he just wanted a sex buddy. Save yourself some stress. And just find someone who is serious enough in getting to know you. 

(Source: Instagram)

4. You didn’t leave the first date feeling excited

Again, your feelings play a major role when it comes to dating someone. So even on the first date you didn’t get that satisfaction, please don’t ever proceed with the second date. Your energy is trying to tell you something. If that person or the ambience was off, that should be your cue. Do not drain your energy trying to spend time with the wrong person. Protect your vibes. 

Aside from these major red flags, here’s another list of situations that could lead to a less-than-desirable second date. In other words, save your time and outfit for someone deserving of your presence.

  • They talk about their ex more than once.
  • They can’t hold a casual conversation.
  • They have negative energy and only get excited when bringing others down.
  • They complain too much (again negative energy).
  • They’re always on their phone.
  • They don’t take the time to get to know you.
  • They lack simple manners.
  • You aren’t present (mentally).
  • You realize you aren’t attracted to him.
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