So there’s a new thing in town and it’s called friend zoning. A dating term used to describe a relationship whereby one person wants more than just friendship and the other just, ah well, wants to be friends. This often happens to men and when this happens it’s difficult or almost impossible to undo the position crowned upon them.
The term “friend zone” popularized in the hit sitcom Friends when a lovesick Ross just couldn’t get Rachel to look at him any other way and was labeled the “mayor of the Friend Zone” by his other housemates. In another hit television series, Scrubs, the main character J.D. explains that once something important, a turning point, occurs between a guy and a girl, they have 48 hours to do something about it or else the guy will be stuck in the girl’s “friend zone” forever.
You know how they say that it’s impossible for a man and woman to be just friends? Well, that usually works for men, mostly. To a woman, a male friend, not necessarily gay, is the best of both worlds. He’s the “friend” she goes to for logic, advice and help without the need for emotional entanglements and sex. The moment a woman encounters any guy they quickly categorize him into a friend or lover category.
How many movies have we seen where the guy plays the gay friend (Hot Chick), family nanny (Mrs. Doubtfire) and best friend (When Harry Met Sally) just to get closer to the girl he fancies in hopes that one day they’ll change their minds?
If a man’s always willing to hang out with you, go grocery shopping and listen to your problems for hours, he’s definitely in to you. There is no logical way that he just wants to be friends and go through this, what most men would call, agony. Be aware and never take advantage of this situation. It might be easier to ignore the signs and just continue life as usual because by bringing it up, you risk losing this friendship.
However, it’s much better to be clear from the very beginning that you’re not interested in him that way and best to give your friendship some space until he gets over you.
If you both go out together, don’t expect him to pay for your meals or chauffeur you around because he’s not your boyfriend and if you have no intention to make him one, do the right thing and split the bills. He’s not your man to boss around and asking him to pay for your meals or shopping. That’s just plain mean!
Remember, karma always gets back to you somehow.
