It’s alarming to see anyone getting hurt in general, especially women. Whether you’re being verbally tormented or battered bloody by your so-called ‘better half’, it’s horrifying.
In the last week, we’ve seen two videos of domestic abuse surface, and it’s mortifying to see just how easily men can do it without even any remorse.
Just recently, a CCTV footage of a man hitting his wife in an elevator went viral on Facebook. But the one that really caught our attention was a video of man beating a woman with a hammer went viral. The woman, believed to be his ex-girlfriend, suffered 30 stitches to her head. The victim, Lim Pui Lee admitted that they’ve having violent quarrels for a while now. The two are divorcees and have been in a relationship for over 13 years now. [Source]
The video was allegedly recored by their 13-year-old daughter who witnessed the fight. Watch it here:
“My relatives advised me to record a video the next time I was abused so when he started hitting me on Sunday, my daughter took out her phone and recorded it”.
Is anyone else baffled by what the victim said? Here are three bits of the entire statement that caught our attention:
i. “My relatives advised”
ii. “..the next time I was abused”
iii. “..my daughter took out her phone”.
Let’s go through each of them, shall we?
i. “My relatives” indicates that her family knows he’s an abusive man. The fact that they have advised her on what to do next (which was to record the incident) shows that they’re unaware that domestic abuse is in fact punishable by law. People in Malaysia are still unaware that the Domestic Violence Act exists and should make a police report whenever any form of abuse (physical or psychological) has been inflicted upon. The victim’s relatives should know better that once a family member of theirs endures something as traumatic as this, proper action should be taken.
ii. “..the next time” tells us that the victim predicts that the abuse is bound to continue, or that it happens quite often and its surprisingly becoming a “normal” thing among the former couple.
iii. “..my daughter took out her phone” – Sure it’s a good idea to show concrete evidence that you’re a victim of abuse, but instead of actually recording it, shouldn’t the smarter action be to contact the police?
We want to be make it clear that we’re not trying to put the victim at fault, but we’re trying to send the message that a lot of women should know what the proper course of action should be when they become victims of domestic abuse. A lot of married women are afraid of exposing the truth for fear of putting their partners in trouble.
Taslima Nasreen, an award-winning writer and human rights activist once wrote: “We are more abused, harassed, exploited, kidnapped, raped, trafficked, murdered by our lovers, husbands, fathers, brothers, uncles, cousins, friends, or men we know well than by strangers. Whatever happens to us, we never stop loving men.”
That haunting piece of truth is undeniably true. We’ve become the punching bags of the people we love, and despite the bruises and blood spill, we still never hesitate to iron their shirts or prepare dinner. We can still choose to love, but when that love is not appreciated, the only course is to move on. If you’re a victim or know a victim of domestic abuse, feel free to contact the All Women’s Action Society for advice.
More about domestic violence:
OPINION: “I Was Emotionally Abused by My Ex-Boyfriend, But I Survived”
Facebook Uploads Privacy Guide for Domestic Violence Survivors
Nigella Lawson Physically Abused by Husband in London Restaurant