Relationships are complex and complicated as hell. Put two people together, and it can either be harmonious or volatile. With that being said, every relationship requires boundaries.
We may feel that boundaries are unnecessary because our partner is supposed to already know and act on our needs and wants, or that they ruin the relationship or interfere with the spice. But in reality, all healthy relationships have boundaries. A relationship can’t be healthy until both partners communicate their boundaries clearly, and the other person respects them.
For example, they may involve what behavior is okay and what is not and how to respond if someone passes those limits. Here are a few tips to help you get started establishing boundaries with your partner in your relationship:
- Communicate your thoughts with one another. Be honest, clear and respectful when sharing your thoughts and feelings with your partner. If they really love you, they’ll understand.
- Never assume or guess your partner’s feelings. Making assumptions can create a lot of misunderstandings in a relationship. Always, always, always try your best to ask rather than assume.
- Take time to reflect and be responsible for your actions. Instead of immediately blaming your partner for the situation, take a step back and think about the choices you’ve made in the relationship and see if they may have contributed to the situation. Both partners should be doing this.
- Be strong enough to understand when it’s time to move on. Everyone has the right to be treated with respect and fairness. If your partner can’t respect your boundaries, then it may be time to end the relationship. Respect yourself enough to know when it’s time to move on.
Instead of immediately blaming your partner for the situation, take a step back and think about the choices you’ve made in the relationship and see if they may have contributed to the situation.
In conclusion, yes, setting boundaries isn’t always comfortable and people may push back if you say NO to some things or try communicating your needs more clearly—but having boundaries also can ensure that relationships can be mutually respectful, appropriate, and caring.